Stock Certificate of the Month
Every stock has a story, and its physical stock certificate is a unique part of it. As more and more companies are opting for electronic registration of shares only, Adam has been on a quest to collect as many companies physical stock certificates as he can. Each month we look to highlight a different certificate as these former vital pieces of paper for trading become obsolete.
Our thoughts:
This month we're looking at a Kohl's stock certificate, and much like a Kohl's store on a Tuesday afternoon, there's a lot of empty space here that nobody's quite sure what to do with.
Let's start with the slogan: "expect great things." Bold words for a company whose stock chart looks like someone tried to draw the Grand Canyon. If you bought this share hoping for great things, the greatest thing it did was teach you a valuable lesson about retail turnarounds. Since my time of acquiring this one share, I can confirm that "expect great things" was more of a suggestion than a forecast.
The par value is $0.01 (equivalent value of $100 in Kohl's Cash), which is coincidentally about what one share feels worth after a few years of watching retail traffic evaporate. Fitting for a company that built its empire on making you think you saved 60% on something that was marked up 70% first.
There are two facsimile executive signatures down at the bottom, because even the signatures here are a knockoff of the real thing — which, honestly, is the most on-brand detail on the whole document.
The decorative border features an ornate, repeating pattern that vaguely resembles rows and rows of clearance racks stretching into infinity, which is either intentional art direction or an accident so perfect it deserves a Kohl's Cash reward.
Verdict: A handsome certificate for a company whose best years are framed on a wall rather than reflected on a chart. Expect great things — just not from the stock price.
*The views expressed here are satirical and do not constitute investment advice. BXM Wealth LLC is an SEC-registered investment advisor. We manage portfolios with considerably more rigor than this review might suggest. But we did frame the certificate.